Thursday

The Daily Mark Sanchez to Canton Watch: No mercy

The haters are out. Our boy is getting no respect, let alone love, and we’re not just talking about what the meanies in Beantown are saying.

Before we get to the nationwide predictions for the Sanchize’s demise against New England on Sunday, here’s a quick look at the vicious things being hurled at him on PatsFans.com.

Not only did Patsox23 feel it was his calling in life to start a thread titled “Mark Sanchez = Nuke LaLoosh”, he also found it necessary to call the Jets’ rookie “a freakin’ idiot”.

Why?

Apparently because the kid provided bland responses to reporters’ questions intended to bait him into saying something that would make Patsox23 feel he was a whole lot worse than just a freakin’ idiot. Perhaps something so awful that Patsox23 would wish for Sanchez to be sentenced to a lifetime of sitting in a cold room listening to Kanye West babble empty apologies.

Rather than get shot down for crucifying Sanchez too early, though, Patsox23 found camaraderie – go figure – as BonzoBurns took a shot at the USC product’s masculinity.

“Well, the Jets QB’s [sic] do have a tradition of wearing female undergarments, ala [sic] Joe Nammoth. [sic] It is possible that Dirty Sanchez may wear a garner[sic] belt under his uniform.”

KontradictioN [stupid] shows surprising command of the language, if not facts with his sarcastic contribution to the Information Age: “Honestly, I’m not even quite sure why defenses are bothering to take the field this year. Just give Sanchez and the Jets the Lombardi already. Jesus, if you just watched ESPN, and ESPN only, you would think that the Jets have won 8 of the last 9 Super Bowls.”

And that Mark Sanchez was already inducted into Canton … but we digress…

While the Beantowners have been hard on the Legend from Long Beach, the prognosticators around the nation have been much, much more insulting. As Sanchez prepares to face a Bill Belichick team for the first time, the critics are associating him with these fine names: Chris Weinke, Joey Harrington, Byron Leftwich, Luke McCown and Vince Young. A Drab Five that all have one thing in common: They were rookie quarterbacks embarrassed by Belichick’s Patriots. Only Ben Roethlisberger has managed to beat Belichick in his first year.

Yet, there is hope. And it comes from the most unlikely of places – Boston; where, back on PatsFans.com, Bill B. said this: “You know I hate the Jets, but I am finding it difficult to dislike Sanchez. I watched the second half of the Jets’ game and Sanchez looked pretty good. He also plays with enthusiasm. I know he is still a rookie and will have his ups and downs this year, but I think the Jets will have a pretty decent QB for some time.”

Getting a hated rival to respect you a few days before you aim to toss him from the mountain? Maybe this Sanchez kid is a god after all.

The Daily Mark Sanchez to Canton Watch
Day 3: Fightin’ words
Day 2: Nicknames
Day 1: Journey Begins

*The DMSTCW forecasts Mark Sanchez will be inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame in 2030 after an 18-year career during which he will accumulate: 111,186 passing yards (he was born on November 11, 1986); 6 Super Bowl championships (to go along with his uniform number); $1 billion in endorsements (including several deals involving teeth-whitening products); 11,550 panties (same numbers as the zip code of the Jets’ headquarters in Hempstead, New York, which incidentally, will be renamed Sanchezstead upon his retirement); enough pats on the behind from Ed the Fireman to make him feel uncomfortable; and 1 kiss from Suzy Kolber (willingly given).

PHOTO: Courtesy of Sprint

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